Eraman

New Era College Senate Head Punched While Giving Speech
KAJANG: What started out as a happy event turned chaotic at the New Era College convocation. A man went up to the stage as college senate chairman Dr Yap Sin Tian was giving a speech and punched him in the face in front of 500 people, including students, parents and guests....

Crewness Production presents the movie of this year's Chinese New Year!

One Man, who was trained under the grandmaster of Wushu...

will fight for the right of the people...



Eraman, 29/1/2009

Pearl of the Dead

Making Penang A Pearl Again

GEORGE TOWN: Penang Chief Minister Lim Guan Eng will implement infrastructure projects this year that will unlock the value of state-owned land and equip the state with WiFi and WiMAX to generate revenue for the state during the current economic downturn.

He said for example, the second bridge, when completed, would enhance the value of the state land in Batu Kawan.....

Penang Lauches Free WiFi Despite Opposition

GEORGE TOWN: The Penang Free WiFi project was launched Wednesday as three test sites in the state opened for business.

Chief Minister Lim Guan Eng launched the test-drive promotion period at Komtar saying the state was pushing on with its initiative despite opposition from certain quarters....

“If WiFi is harmful, the first two people to get fried by radiation would be Jelutong MP Jeff Ooi and myself as we work up to 12 hours a day at our offices on Komtar’s 28th floor where there are four hotspots.

(The Star Newspaper)

The Star reported that Chief Minister Lim is going to upgrade Penang into a major tourism destination and to turn the economy around.

One of the initiative taken is to blanket the entire Penang state with wireless service, and that has caused protest among the public due to the risk that it may pose to them...

It is the year 2020...

Radio : Tut Tut... this is Malaysia News. Good Morning i am Fairul Mainuh, with you on Radio 4 News. Penang has been heavily infested by zombies, it seems the side effect of the wireless fidelity has started to take its course. Meanwhile the Prime Minister of Malaysia, YAB Dato' Najib says..

"I want every single frigget' we have sent to obliterate those stinky pebbles!" - PM

Radio : What he meant by every single frigget' are stuffs like our..

"Asimo Robotic Unit" ( that we bought for USD$15.2 billion to disperse protests for 10+1 free robots)

"Malaysian Zombie Tank" ( we have 2, USD$5 billion each)

Radio : Dato' Najib also said that the military investment of the Asimo Troops and the Zombie Tank finally paid off for we can now contain the zombies. He also said he was influenced by games like Left 4 Dead and movies like Resident Evil before he signed the "Anti-Zombie Act"

"I knew a time like this would come, when the people protested about the WiFi in Penang, i can forsee that we human will some day turn among our ownself. With the Zombie Tank and Asimo Troops we can now be proud to be a Malaysian and a leader in the War Against Zombie." - PM

Radio : In the next "LOCAL" news, a robbery occured in the middle of Bangkok City whereby.............

What is Penang? Wiki then...

So what do you think about the WiFi policy? Should the Penang State Government execute it? Yes No?

After such constructive sound like question, just like what you hear in the lecture class, they are already implementing the WiFi, so what is there to argue about? Let's wait for the next generation to come...

Peace of Insanity #001

My first try at comic...It's bad, I know. Live it it. Hopefully it gets better with time.

The 99cents Store

Shoplot for Rent - At Only 99sen
GEORGE TOWN: It’s only 99 sen a month – that’s the “AirAsia” rate shop-owners at Pan Palace Plaza in Taman Lip Sin are offering in a bid to revive the commercial centre. And response has been overwhelming. Fifty...

(The Star Newspaper)

The Star Newspaper announced that there is a shopping centre called Pan Palace Plaza in Taman Lip Sin at Penang is charging only 99 cents per month to rent a shop there, incredibly cheaper than drinking a cup of coffee.
Crewness takes a peek at the opening ceremony itself.

Lady A : Eh eh.. i heard there is an offer in front there... at Pan Palace Plaza charging one shop for only 99 cents!
Lady B : Oh really? How come so cheap? Let's skip the market and head there. Shopping season for Chinese New Year... must grab whatever cheap things possible!
Lady A : Let's have a look.
Developer : Calling everyone,! Calling everyone! Today we are going to do a cheap sale. Air Asia is going to do some marketing knick knack for us.... you can own an entire shop for only 99 cents! Do whatever you want as long as you occupy the centre!
Crowd : Whoah whoah so cheap..!
Student : Err Sir! Can i open a "DVD store"! Especially during this period of time, it is very lucrative, i am sure it will help revive this centre!
Developer : Yes! It is people like you that we are looking for, having the will and the vision to achieve success! I see future in your business! As long as you bloat this entire center with people! You are free to do so anything you want!
Man B : I wish to use this 99 cents opportunity to help the homeless, i am going to buy the entire centre, you have roughly 100 shop lots for example? I will toss you RM99! and i will populate this center!
Developer : Yes good one! Then we can automatically have 5000 people in the center daily, and we are on our way in beating the Evil Queesnbay Mall!
Man C : Chinese New Year is closing by, i am going to do my open house here, is that possible? 99 cents only, and there is a 24 hours supermarket and huge parking bay below, very convenient right?
Developer : Not bad! Your open house will definitely come with a lion dance which will help build up the Feng Shui here! I like your idea!
Guy : Errr.... should i put this RM1 note into the donation box right there? or .... ?
Developer : The second sir! Putting into the this centre, will allow you to put in RM100 into that donation box in 1 week, RM1000 in 1 month, RM10000 in 3 months! Sounds like a perfect plan right?!
Lady A : Yaaaa! I am also going to tell my husband! I quit being a housewife and i am going to open my food stall there... After all even if my food sucks, the Penang food psychology will take over the customers mind and i shall be rich RICH rich!!
Developer : Hmmph.. okay... even if you don't have what it takes, i am sure your housewife look will definitely sell! Go ahead!
Lady B : Darn.. my son works in Queensbay Mall's Starbucks Coffee, i cannot allow this to happen! This has to stop! I am buying this entire mall whatever the cost is!!!
Developer : I am afraid you know very well about the no-frills concept of this sale which is similar to Air Asia's, so please do expect extra hidden charges like air condition (RM2 per hour), storage (RM10 per hour), 30% profit to us, we will be counting each head in your shop (RM0.01 per head) and ...

Crewness Travel Tour : Putrajaya

CTT, Crewness Travel Tour takes a group of tourist around Malaysia's Intelligent Garden City, Putrajaya.
Tour Leader : Welcome welcome! Welcome to Putrajaya, Malaysia's Intelligent Garden City and also Malaysia's Federal Administrative state! First thing first, why is it intelligent? Because it is so smart, all the houses here are equipped with the latest technology, CCTV, high speed internet connection, you name it. Then why is it a garden? Just look around you, it looks like a garden to you right? Right....
Tourist : Ermmm... can i ask? As i read in the tourism booklet, it said that Putrajaya used to be an oil palm estate. So how does it transformed into a mega city like this? I was just wondering...
Tour Leader : That's a very good question my dear friend. First of all, you may be wondering why is there a huge lake around here when it's an oil palm estate. The answer is simple, we in Malaysia love to be the pioneer of breaking the orthodox and also to be noticed in the eyes of the world. So, what we did was, from a flat land, we dug a hole, filled some water over it, and built a bridge over it. Does it make sense to you? From a flat land, we dug a hole, filled some water over it, and built a bridge over it... (Wait does this even make any sense?) ...
Tourist : Isn't that abit...
Tour Leader : Okay okay! Move on move on...!

Tourist : What is that? That looks like a nuclear missile?!
Tour Leader : Exactly... Malaysia has been keeping a low profile. We have actually been storing our nukes behind the scene, sooner or later we will become the next superpower. (Gosh.. but i have no idea why they hide it behind a missile like sculpture?). Well as you have noticed, that we have been told that our economy is still growing despite other nations are undergoing recession, so we are one step closer towards becoming the next world power! Our Prime Minister is actually adopting the "act pig eat tiger" trick. Be humble at the beginning and start the game later on. When the world is in peril, that one and only nuclear weapon in missile will be used! But i heard we paid 5 times the original price to get this nuke.


Tourist : Why are there so many mosques here? They are just 100m away from each other?
Tour Leader : Nope that building looks like a mosque, but it ain't. It's the Prime Minister's Office! Just like your Washington White House!
Tourist : Errm... then why are there kids playing in front of the PM office? Are those his wife and kids? Shouldn't the PM office be dealing with the country's affair or everything serious?
Tour Leader : Yes you are correct! But our PM yearns to take one step ahead, which is to allow public to have some fun in front of his office. With that he can get a bird's eye view of the people's mood. If the people there are unhappy, then he will know that his policies are somewhat weird, if the people are happy, then okay~ proceed with the policy! So it's like a test drive thingy...

Tourist : Why are there telephone booths around the plaza area? What in the world?
Tour Leader : It is not weird at all, Malaysia is a unique country. We love fusing stuff together in order to innovate and introduce new technologies to the world! We have this phone booth in the middle of no where which will be a good idea in the eyes of the world, and after all since they already built a pole, might as well stuff in a public telephone.... you wouldn't wanna miss a chance of making money aren't ya.

Tourist : Oh my god, what creature is that?
Tour Leader : Do not worry, there is nothing to be afriad of! That is called the Dugong Putra which can only be found in Putrajaya and it is also part of the beautification plan of Putrajaya. Because you know, before Putrajaya was created, it was a Palm Estate. After they chop off the trees, they found that they have chased the wild animals away. So, they initiated a project to CREATE a new species which is the Dugong Putra to balance up the food chain. Why? Because no animal would wanna live here, it's so blazing hot and concrety which doesn't feels like the good ol' forest. Don't worry, it doesn't bite, it feeds on water only. Ain't it something cute?? (I can't imagine how much money was spent on that...) err.. okay moving on..


Tourist : Is that boat ride part of our program? I really wish it would be... can we have a ride on it?
Tour Leader : No No! It's not included... and even if you want to, it is not encouraged! The boat ride itself costs RM100 per head for a round trip around the city. Imagine what can you see on a man made lake? Nothing but man made fishes, like the Dugong Putra. Plus it is just the same anywhere at all? I think the bus ride will do you just good! Don't even think about it, even if you are disturbed...

Tourist : That bridge is really eccentric and ornate.. but what does it actually reflects? Particularly any Malaysian culture?
Tour Guide : I really got no idea at all... futuristic you may say, perhaps to reflect that we Malaysians are producing more and more robots(graduates) for our future generation?

*This article of "Crewness Travel Tour : Putrajaya" is merely a satire. Putrajaya is Malaysia's vibrant administative capital, for the serious stuff check out wikipedia.

Hello 2009 for Final Conflict

It's a new year, welcome to 2009!
and brace yourself for 2009's long anticipated action packed movie, Final Conflict.