5 Reasons Why You Wouldn't Want a Green Team in your College

EARTH DAY
5 Reasons Why You Wouldn't Want a Green Team in your College

Food Assault

The Green Team will assault all the hawker stalls and restaurants nearby by destroying all polystyrene, plastic cutlery, etc etc... A huge lost to the food industry which will lead to the their exit, and result in no choice in dining selection.

"Gime all the polystyrene NOW! Hand them all to me! You shall not take away your food!" (Grabs the polystyrene packagings, throwing them onto the floor, and stomps them)

Blazing Hot

The Green Team will at time hijack into the power room and destroy the air condition operation. If they like, they might even break all lights around the college making sure there is no usage of electricity at all... after all to them, how many uses the education facilities in the night except some "cheeky" people.

"The college is built with windows around for ventilation... i don't see any purpose of turning on the air condition... as part of the Green Team... i am going to wreck any form of energy leeching appliances!"

Advertise Not

Colleges frequently post notice around using papers and to the non-environmental conscious unlike the Green Team, to them any paper that is use for the second time is called used paper. The problem is that the Green Team will march around college tearing off any advertising paper on events, new facilities, announcements, and so on.. To them, recycling them and producing a brand new paper is more liable than spamming unnecessary advertisement around campus.

(We weren't able to interview the Green Team as we can only see them tearing off all the paper notice around campus... even the certificates of faculties... )

Earth Hour a Week

This will definitely incite protest among the students but gain the support of the college administration. The Green Team will definitely suggest a weekly Earth Hour to set awareness among students on the serious environmental situation today. The administration which intend to save cost will definitely support this idea or maybe even propose it to be daily and at a 'non-voluntary' basis.

"I think the Earth Hour is a great idea to save energy, and by doing so we can make a different. I know other colleges may think that we are a sad college by doing so... but hey look down the road, and we are actually helping you to enjoy the future! Well... if other colleges doesn't wanna do the same, i will propose this to the Ministry and i am sure they will turn this into a Dead Earth Hour... that was what i told other colleges student council, and they straight away adept to it"

Green Knight Patrol

The Green Knight Patrol is the most fearful authority... it patrols around making sure students doesn't litter around. Worse of all, they even make the students around campus to either recycle or re-use the rubbish instead of disposing into the garbage.

"The Green Knight Patrol is to enforce a conducive environment instilling love for the environment... What is the point of keeping the environment clean by disposing into the garbage, you are actually harming it when it gets to the wasteland... So we make sure that students either recycle or reuse them!"

Imaginary Conversation Between 2 Storywriters.

The topic says everything, so no introduction needed, no beating around the bush, no nothing. Just straight to the point. Let's call the two storywriters as A and B for a certain movie *cough*Knowing*cough*.

A: Hey, it's getting harder to make a good story that everyone likes nowadays la. The audience is getting smarter n smarter, its like they've developed exquisite ability to predict the storyline. We can't give them a surprise!!! I even heard that in one movie called "infections", the audience laughed at that show, but its a horror movie! How how? Any idea a?

B: No problem. We just simply give them something in the plot, which appears to be an important clue to all the mystery, but ends up with no importance whatsoever. Yea, what say u a stone? We shall make it that someone creepy gives the Chosen One a bloody stone. It'll make people think that the stone is friggin' important. And whazza, bam, whush, the stone ends up being just a stone!!! Yea, that'll get them going. Yea!

A: Wow! You're good! You're da man, man! But we're doing mystery then? Audience smarter and cleverer nowadays la! What can we do to make them captivated?

B: Hm, looking at the trends these past few years, people like horror(Ju-on, The Ring, name ur pick), mystery( numb3rs, da vinci code, pink panther, name ur pick), end of the world type(I am legend) and many more. So we just put everything interesting into one movie. We shall make a movie about Armageddon coming, aliens, horror, people dying, prophecy, and everything! Yea! We're gonna make a movie about everyone going to die according to a prophecy - written in numbers of course -, and a hero that is going to solve the mystery and save the world! Yea!

A: Wow! You're God, man! But then the story will be predictable also wat. Everyone will know that the main hero will save everyone.

B: Elementary. We'll just have to make it as though the Armageddon is inevitable, no matter how hard the "hero" does, he'll NEVER save the world. Ha! How's tat? In the end, everyone dies, Earth dies, and the alien brings some of the humans to another planet! HAHAHAHAHA. I'm a genius! Yea!

A: Goodness gracious, this movie's a masterpiece lah. We'll sure hit it big now. Yey! But our budget's limited. And since the casting wants Nic Cage as the main protagonist, and factor in the CGI department's payroll, we're short on cash to hire a good female protagonist. How ah? Plus, we haven't sort out the female protagonist's characters. How how how??

B: Tsk, no matter. We can simply pick one aspiring actress out of the lot. They'll be more than happy to appear in a blockbuster movie of the year!!! RAWR! And about the characters, we have more than enough share of courageous, witty, knowledgeable, and impressive heroines of late. The audience has got bored with them all. What say you we make a totally annoying and paranoid heroine. That'll win us the Oscar for Best Picture, I daresay! Yea!

A: Wow, you ARE a genius lah! Pro pro!

B: Yea! Hahaha! Let's drink to the success of this film. Yea!

Earth Hour

Crewness Thesis : 3 Reasons Why Are We Celebrating Earth Hour

We at Crewness State University are excited about Earth Hour, and thinks that a thorough research on it should be done. We have compiled the reasons on why Earth Hour should be celebrated and gotten some views from the public!

Show Your Gratitude to The Robots

We have Mother's Day, Father's Day to show our gratitude to our parents. We have Merry Christmas Day to remember to birth of Christ. We have the Labor Day, to let labors rest for their hard work. Earth Hour is technically a Robot Day, where we let our machines rest. But the fact that they are robots, that's why we are only giving them an hour.

Hiding from the Third Kind
Scientists and Astronomers have discovered that a mysterious alien is wandering around our solar system and the only solution to avoid being invaded is to play dead. Switch off all your lights and power, so we Earth will look like a dead planet, like any other planets. Well you may say, what if the aliens saw the daylight part of Earth? Well let's just say we are betting a 50:50 chance!

Of Dollars, Cents, and Pacts
Some theorists has investigated the fishiness of Earth Hour. By tracing back to its root, it was organized by the World Wildlife Fund and was first done in Sydney. It is a known fact, that to lead all you have to lead through example, and WWF has accumulated the entire globe to follow likewise. Within the 1 hour light shutdown, who knows what is going to happen? Robbers closed deal with WWF to initiate their plan, labor union made a pact with WWF to get 1 hour night off, parenting association made an agreement with WWF to force their kids home for 1 hour, and so on? Ofcourse the pacts come with a price to pay. It's a lucrative business...

To support this thesis, we got point of views from the public as well...

Crewness asks:
Will you celebrate Earth Hour tonight?
Chong : Oh yeah, sure sure, its a cool event, everybody is doing it, and i think i should do it too, to show my support, yeah its cool its cool... i am so gonna turn my lights off at 8:30pm and hop onto the cyber cafe till late night.. ofcourse with my new boosted 3.0 Ceffiro.
Misha : Yeah, i was like anticipating event ini la... dan my fren and i plan to enjoy our night at the neighbourhood rock your Earth Hour, they are going to have loud musics, performances, laser lightings... can't wait for it!
Binbin : I will switch off my lights at 8:30pm and sleep...

Crewness asks:
So how are you going to spread Earth Hour? Since you know it, i am sure there are some who don't.
Chong : Yeah i know, especially my colleagues, they are ignorant people... I thought of it, i would print full laser colored posters, as papers are free in my office right. With that, i will paste them around. With the colorful pictures there, i am sure they will notice it.
Misha : I am going to urge them! You shall not consume power unnecesarily! They should not simply send SMSes. I remember i read somewhere that 100 SMses sent could power a bike! How to do it? Ofcourse through SMSes....
Binbin : Oh yeah, i am not going to turn off my laptop, and i am going to leave a personal message on my Facebook and Windows Messenger as "If you are reading this message now, you are a dick, you have commited sin against Earth!"

Crewness crews were also having a tough time conducting this research, due to Google's initiative on Earth Hour...

What do you think about Earth Hour? What have you done on Earth Hour? Did you support? Why so?

Truth and Lie : Garden Lake in the City

Truth and Lie : Garden Lake in the City

The Dying Lie : What the? A lake in the middle of a bustling city? No way! Yes way unless you are having eye sore.
The natural lake in the middle of the city is an asset to city dwellers. Urban planners have carefully drafted their plan to not touch this lake. Why? It acts as a natural cooling system for the city, the frontier in the fishing industry, providing leisure for family to spend some time together.
This is truly a remarkable landmark which the future generation must preserve!

The Dying Truth : Note the square space. It was supposed to be a complex with basement. Dive into the lake and you can find the building's scaffold, junks, cements, trolleys, plastics, etc., ie. a discovery of a lost civilization.
In short, it's an empty dug abandoned project filled up with rain water. After all it's much more expensive to fill up the dug land area, might as well release a fish or two and turn it into a lake.